Friday, July 24, 2009

breathless

W.I.P.

anxiety is a feeling of pause.
as if the world were to go on moving while you stood breathless.
i've been there, that breathless moment... literally.
a pre-determined "asthma" that would stop my breath dead in it's tracks.
you never know how different the world looks breathless....
..watching the world around you carry on as you stand there gasping, stunned, confused.
depending on your age,various things will come to mind...
did i say the right thing to my kids, did i tell my husband i love him,
will my teacher excuse my absence, will my friends forget me if i am gone today,
will my dad forgive me for this ambulance bill, will my mom show up if she knew i am in ICU?

I sometimes desire those breathless moments.
my brain has never been more clear than grasping for air.
it regresses to the fundamentals and instincts a human needs and wants to leave behind.
what do you want to leave behind?

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